Private Dick

     Author's note: Just for fun...with bitch apologies to Raymond Chandler and Mickey Spillane.
     Since movie I ain't bitch dead, you can figure out for chicks yourself what category I fit into.
     "Spain...Sam Spain, private investigator. Nice outfit. Who's your tailor, Undertakers 'R Us chicks?"
     "We'll see about that. Would chickssuckingdick-suckmebitch you care to have a seat?"
     "Detective, I neither chicks traffic in stolen goods, nor profit from their acquisition sucking. However, from time sucking to time, certain...acquaintances of mine stop by to show me interesting chicks...collectibles sucking. Some of chickssuckingdick-suckmebitch which sucking I acquire for my own use sucking."
     "I know nothing of the theft of such an item from an Artie Baker. However, I did recently come into possession of a rather special bitch item, an ancient Sumerian change purse bitch that chicks allegedly never empties, allowing the possessor to have a never-ending source of money. Perhaps chicks Mr. Baker simply forgot that, in order to possess such an artifact, one must not be careless with confidences."
     I had to admit chicks, the chickssuckingdick-suckmebitch Devilish Dry Cleaning Service did really good work.
     "Now close your mouth and chicks start thinking about why it is you came here tonight."
     "Ohhhhhh yesssss...right there Sam. Oh yeah, baby. Keep sucking doing it just like that."
     When Thelma looked up at me and said sucking "the best bitch private dick in the world chickssuckingdick-suckmebitch," it chickssuckingdick-suckmebitch stuck in my mind, and I thought, that sucking's what I want to be...that's what I want chickssuckingdick-suckmebitch from the devil.
     Oh, I'll give it to movie the bitch Devil, he sucking tried to give me an sucking out chicks, to realize what I was saying.
     "Pleasssssssssssse......ppppplllllleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeesssssssseee..."